Forgiefan

In The End

take your time
you'll know why  
in the end
we two lovers can never be friends

so much for songs
to place us where we belong
memories still vivid  
but your feelings are all gone

I still love you
after all this time
I still need you
from the daily grind
to pass me by

trouble stays  
in your gaze
eat me up
maybe my soul will fill your cup

bitter pills
taste the same in a winter chill
you choose to live on
dragging the ball and chain four years long

I still feel you
your knife in my heart
I still see you
fucking in the dark
so run me dry

As Long As You Come First

and i’m feeling so because of you
behind your wall its hard to break through
would you let me in, please? 
would you fill me up with your disease? 

and i’m falling asleep in these alien sheets
but you don’t care as long as you come first
and i’m begging you please, would you set me free? 
but you don’t care as long as you come first

beautiful stranger in the night, would you make me safe? 
cos family isn’t right, in this day and age
i’m letting you go to the stars
i believe i can love you, even from afar

Baby i can never know the songs
i can never know the songs you like, you like
baby i can never touch your heart
i can never touch your heart, your heart

Kingdoms and Queens

Here’s to feeling unprepared, disbelief at what you’ve chosen
Dogs on their bellies, oh they’re scared, water on the street has frozen
You say you belong to nowhere and no one, son, but you’re wrong
I’d take you for my own but I’m weary to the bone

I can’t take another step, another failure in your eyes
Previous knowledge understands all that I’m doing is wasting time
You say you have the book and my name is written in red
I think you’re a liar but I’ll retire for dead

Condescending me
Falling off the tree
How’d you know my heart would stray for these? 

This new year makes me think of you, flowers in the evening sky
Your voice is laughter on the wind, I try to run but my heart won’t die
I’ve fallen to my knees but this kingdom and its queen is cruel
The vision’s uncertain, February is like a jewel

Ten years, life has won
Shadows cling to bonds
Earthly games you play alone to tease

In Loving Memory

And you’ve fallen asleep between my arms and cheek to cheek
but I know I can never be whole
And you’ve found your place wrapped in his arms
I’m lost in the space between your head and your heart
Which is home? 

Is he handsome? Is he strong? 
Does he give you everything besides your own very song? 
I bet you’re nervous just like me
Do I tie you down while he sets you free? 

Tempting as it is to turn to you
Your breath needs to live, your words they find no use
In this last embrace, I know that smell
You reek of his stench
Yes you play this game too well

Can I forgive this? No more or less
Here I suffer your delusion, your call of distress
Yet you’re perfect, so unlike me
I sense your hatred, you are so discreet

I curse God for my fate
Once again I’m too late  
To love you
To love you always

Oh my love, the dawn is near
It should be clear you’re not going anywhere
The clock strikes three, I failed to see
what you mean to me

Oh my love

Midnight

Your love from your slipper to my shoe
Is this how you show it? that’s what you do
You leave me hanging on a tree
You decide without asking me
And you have your cushions
And i just keep on writing
All these sad songs for you

My love oh you don’t have a clue
All these talks about me and you
Your love is like a vine round a tree
This box is suffocating me
And you have your distractions
All I have is in my head
But my dreams are not good enough for you

Isn’t “no” an answer enough? 
I keep silent to call your bluff
You want to prove you’re doing well
Your words ring familiar bells
And you have your reasons
And I just keep on lying
Keep on lying that I'm true
Just so you know my heart is cruel
This garden of will is not made for you
And this time I’m turning my back
Sliding down your serenading

Just so you know I’d keep you simple
Simple so we’d both be free
And I doubt you would understand
That you were meant for heavenly things

Don’t misunderstand (don’t misunderstand) 
You’re just a minuet

My Treasure, My Pearl

And she’s found herself a way to live her life without me
I’m guessing you’ll do the same, you’ll blossom well so near the sea
With the wind in your hair and the sand at your feet
There’s no person you cannot defeat  
So go on, you’ll go on and disarm me

Take the fallen to the sides, I moved too fast to savour
The morning light in your eyes, sleepy with the dust of silver
Rising from these depths as your second not your first
Never to quench my longing and my thirst
Oh you, take out your wand and charm me

I’ll take you, take you far from heights you’ve known
I’d price you, you higher than all the diamonds shown
My treasure, my pearl turned out to be a lie
And the folly, the spray is getting in her eyes

I’d hit her, smack her wide awake from dreams
I’d save her, even if rescue took all of me
But she’s so far away
You’re far away

So go on, you’ll go on and disarm me
 

Caterwauling

Canyons cannot carve that face for me
If I stared too hard please excuse me the intrusion
I’ve fallen away from following the seasons
I’m too gone, too gone to see reasons (to leave you) 

You’ll never know just how it feels to be on this side of losing you
You’ll never show anyone else that softer side of losing you

Too proud, I was too proud to see your frown
I know you, would you like to me hear me drown
Douse my face, maybe I’ll see clearer
I need to believe, believe in a future  

baby you say you’re alone
but your love has arrived just in a shape you’ve never known

I Want You Again

You don’t understand the value of time
You don’t feel the flowers, see the sun for its shine
Your world is so small but you won’t save your friend
What do you know other than I want you again? 

But still I’ll just need you somehow
Though you make me so old
My journey’s end is nowhere tonight
But still I press on through

Does the tea taste sweet when your body’s frail? 
Luxury is all you need in your fairytale
I can be a sailor, a lawyer, anything you’d like
I’m addicted to you, you’re a fire at night

But consider the facts aloud
You live your life so bold
I’d save you if I knew the way out
Its past midnight so you go

This House Still Stands

And you know there’s no return
To the place that we as children burned
The riches at stake
For the lies we make
This house still stands on the hill
Waiting for you to make it a home
The land has changed  
Does hope remain? 

I can’t understand why I am doomed
I fear the worst, my heart’s about to burst
As your image grows dimmer everyday with time

Seas are rising in the dark
As the sun is winding down to rest
But I sit here and fear
Your presence still lingers dear
Fire raging all around
Father’s closed the trapdoor above
The ashes and smoke
Fill my lungs and I choke

I can’t control what fortune is due
You abuse or I lose
Your kindness is an excuse to forget what’s mine
I’ll never know why I needed you
A hole in black has taken its place
And there’s no remaining trace of the life left behind

This house still stands on the hill
Waiting for you to make your home

Kiss Her For Me

Your fire burns deep
but this air is cold, I am blind to see
you come to seek, I'll do as I'm told
but I am not the key

heaven won't find us a way to be free
sins of our fathers linger with me
seasons will change but my love stays the same
so kiss her for me
kiss her for me

This river runs free  
a pot of gold lies at the bottom of the stream
no word you say takes me
the rise and fall of your chest is how you plead

I know you'll be gone when the morning comes
I'm stubborn, I lie in bed and I yawn
hoping your taste will linger on

Autumn leaves blow in the wind without fear
I'll travel far as long as you are here
Winter has gone but your heart won't belong
so kiss her for me
kiss her for me